It seems these days that more people are talking about resiliency skills as a way to effectively cope with all the challenges, changes and stresses in the world today. You hear, see and can even feel the heightened stress levels everywhere you go. Change is happening so quickcly plus there is alot of uncertainty and fear about. Have you ever wondered what the difference is between those who ‘suffer’ from the stress and experience all the negative effects and those who are able to remain detached, immune or simply ‘bounce-back’ from all that is going on?
The simple answer comes down to their mindset and approach to what they experience. Don’t get me wrong here, it is not simply a question of ‘think positive and all will be well’! There are strategies and habits that make a difference. And habits take time to practice before they become routine and natural.
Here are a couple of suggestions that can help you shift your mindset and approach and help you develop your ‘bounce-back-abilities’.
HALT. Ask yourself whether you are Hungary, Angry, Lonely or Tired and if the answer is yes, take care of those needs. How many can relate to feeling tired and worn out, and then struggling to deal with things that come your way? By taking care of your physical needs of food and rest, you will have more emotional capacity, resiliency, to deal with things.
Focus on the positives. Reframe how you look at things by shifting your focus onto those things that are positive around you and those things that you can be grateful for. We may not have any control or influence over a particular situation, however we do have control over how we respond to it. Take a moment to pause and check in with yourself to decide how you want to respond and how you want to frame the situation.
Get the bigger picture. Take a step back to gain a different perspective and to see a bigger picture. When you shift your perspective to put situations into a more positive and perhaps healthier perspective, you can alleviate much of the stress. Also, ask yourself how you might look at this situation in a month’s time, a year’s time or even five years time. How does that help?
Practice compassion. Recognize that we are all doing the very best we can each and every moment given the information we have at the time. So, if you are struggling in a particular moment, know that it will pass and that you may have struggled in the past and come through it, so you will come through it again. What can you say to yourself to remind you to be compassionate with yourself and with others?
Remain flexible. We can become very stressed over situations where we have no control or where they are not exactly like we would like them to be. By becoming more flexible in your attitude and your approach, you will more easily adapt to whatever happens. What lessons can you learn? How might you do things differently? What will help you to see things in a more positive light?
We may not have a choice in events that happen to us or that happen around us. We do however have the choice in how we respond to them. You can chose to let yourself become stressed, angry and frustrated or you can chose to let things go or look at the situation in such a way that helps you to feel better about it and about yourself. So, which way do you chose?
Point to ponder: What strategies can you put in place to have more ‘bounce-back-ability’? What will help you to shift your perspective on the situation? What will make a positive difference to your life, to your attitude and to your approach?